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You know you went to Bwari if...
* You call a 2-litre bottle "glass after glass"
* You
"rocked joint" at some point in your life,
If you were braver, you actually cooked at a staff house.
* Indomie
was most delicious and nutritious
* You got "two-weeks" for buying frame from Mr. Abasiama's office.
* You
knew "I sell bread_one," and "I sell bread_two,"
Even worse, they knew you!
* You had a "lifee," or you had a
friend who had a "lifee."
* You slept on the same bunk bed with a fully grown human being
* You shared half
a bucket of bathing water with another fully grown human being
* You took a bath on the courtyard.
* You took
a bath by the red tank behind Ruby house annex.
* Your first words when you got to the tank were: "After You!"
*
You watched someone being scrubbed with a scrubbing brush on the courtyard, (or YOU were scrubbed on the courtyard with a
scrubbing brush...WE KNOW YOU DONT WANT TO ADMIT IT!)
* You constantly pooped in a pit toilet for six years!
*
You drank water out of a bucket.
* You would rather die than work in "junior toilet."
* You had to serve siesta
* You had to run for dining
* You had to serve punishment because you were late for dining
* You had
to serve punishment because you didnt have a plate or spoon or fork at the dining hall. ( by the way, someone tapped your
plate after you had carefully washed it by the kitchen tank with dripping water and tissue paper)
* They wrote down
your name because you made noise during prep
Now you have to serve punishment AGAIN
You're having nightmares about
the blisters you'll have on your ten fingers by the end of the week.
Saturday comes. Time to serve punishment, but
you find out that someone has tapped your cutlass... but that's okay because doctor says you shouldn't cut grass, and doctor
says you shouldn't sweep, and doctor says you shouldn't scrub, and doctor says you shouldn't mop..and doctor says...
Somehow,
you manage to get out of all that wahala.
The weekend ends.
Monday comes. You go to the line to pick up your
laundry.
Someone has tapped your white blouse
SOMEONE HAS TAPPED YOUR SKIRT!
Of course, it's assembly
day, so you end up borrowing a white blouse that's two sizes too small, and a skirt that's three times your size !
Now
you need a belt
You don't have a belt.
Nobody has a belt!
You pin the skirt on both sides and you
wear a cardigan
The cardigan is a wrong color
Mrs onyechi seizes the cardigan, and you kneel down during assembly
you have to serve punishment again
of course, you try to get out of this one, but Mrs Onyechi won't listen
to the story about what doctor said or didn't say
You're in BIG trouble now
You don't have cutlass.
But
that doesn't matter because Mrs Onyechi has given you a portion to scrape.
You need a hoe.
You don't have a hoe either.
Hmnn....
You're thinking you can't wait for this Bwari life to be over....
...but
you have 5 more years of this to go. bummer :(
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You Know You are in College...
If you have ever price shopped for Top Ramen.
If you
live in a house with three couches, none of which match.
If you consider Pizza a balanced meal.
If you have
ever written a check for 45 cents.
If you have ever seen two consecutive sunrises without sleeping.
If your
underwear supply dictates the time between laundry loads.
If you cannot remember when you last washed your car.
If
you can pack your worldly possessions into the back of a pick-up (one trip).
If your bed time is no longer 10:00 PM,
but 3:00 AM.
If you consider Pizza one of the four major food groups.
If you consider the other 3 to be Soda,
McDonalds, and candy.
If you've ever missed a class to watch daytime soaps..
If you've ever sent e-mail to
the people you live with.
If you've ever spent a good hour searching for your student I.D. just so you could get that
one dollar off at the movies.
If you've ever stayed up all night just so you wouldn't sleep through your morning class.
If you've ever called your roommates, not knowing where you were, and asked them to come get you.
When you
work your class schedule around TV.
When you watch TV with no volume, while listening to the radio.
When you
can play euchre (or spades, hearts, etc.) in any state of mind.
When showering doesn't happen on a daily basis.
When
your microwave is your best friend.
When you're not a dork if you wear your backpack on both shoulders.
When weather
begins to be a major factor on your class attendance.
When you would rather do e-mail than study for a test.
When
your first major appliance is a blender, and your second, a coffee maker.
When you spend a majority of your time reading
forwarded
mail.
When you have to wear your flip flops in the shower because there's so much growing on the bath
tub floor you think you might die from it.
When you have to throw away the tupperware that you find in the refridgerator
because it's been in there for a year and you don't dare open it, you might die from the fumes.
When roomates start
pad locking food cabinets and identifying their possesions by writing their drivers license number all over their stuff (food,
shaving lotion, and everything else that he owns).
When you can only make local calls and have to use your own personal
calling card to make long distance calls because everyone's guilty of not paying for past phone bills.
When you steal
toliet paper from the college restrooms and you get excited when the mission is accomplished.
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